Tuesday, January 03, 2006

There are days...

Like today. So, if you're thinking bright happy post... skip this one!

No, it's not that I'm angry or disgruntled. In fact, I may just be fine but I have a headache and my sinus' are acting up which always gives me that "blech" kind of feeling. Or, it could be that I'm just a bit depressed.

NO. It's not the post holiday thing, if anything, it's the lack of revenue thing. Now, before you all go sending me encouraging recommedations and the like: DON'T. I'm really OK. People are allowed to be a little down on occasion. OK? It's normal - I think ;-)

It's just that this time, for the benefit of all you readers that actually like to see a post when someone isn't all up and chipper, I'm posting. Hey, it's a real emotion. You know? And, I'm having a icky kind of morning. You know, more money going out than coming in, snowing and sleeting outside, not a lot of job postings yet (it's only the 3rd of the month, they won't really start to pick up usually until the middle of the month). I still have to get the oil changed on my wife's van and my car. You know. Life kind of stuff.

Of course, before anyone gets the impulse yet again to send me an encouraging word, I know that I have a lot going on in my favor. I've got a great family, a loving wife, a good skill set and most of all a loving God that's promised to take care of me. That's the abbreviated version, so, it's not that I've lost perspective. It's just that right at the moment I need to breathe this crap out, then get focused on all the good stuff. Then, I need to DO IT.

I'm great at reading stuff, getting all ramped up and ready to go... somewhere around 11:30 at night. Then I go to bed, then get up, feel icky all over again and need to start the process again. Nope. Not this time. Today I'm actually taking the bull by the horns and I'm attacking the stuff now. Not waiting till later. Here, now, back to the focus and onward and upward.

But, just for a moment, this was my breathing the negative out. This was my expressing - damn! this sucks. Hate to do it to my wife, it impacts her a lot. Of course I don't want the kids to know, they're kids and I want to let them be. But for all you folks out there - here you go. Unvarnished MacPhilly. :-)

Now I have to go kick some butt and take some names. My destiny is still out there waiting for me!

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