Why Loving Parents Must Discipline

Being that my last post was about parenting, how much I love parenting and being a dad, I thought this post would be a follow up along the theme. Parenting.

One of the primary responsibilities - hand in hand with LOVE - is discipline. As parents who want to create a loving environment that a child feels safe in, discipline is key. In fact, scripture says that a parent that doesn't discipline his (or her) child doesn't love them! Along with that is also CONSISTENCY, which is crtical! But that's a topic all by itself. For now, I'll stick with my primary thought on discipline and why it's so important for a loving parent to discipline their children.

First of all, we all must have discipline for the purposes of self-governance even at it's most basic level. Discipline to take care of our own hygiene and feeding to say the least, not to mention disciple to clean our environment and take care of all the other things that life requires of us. Without discipline of some type, we would be unable to perform as a functioning member of society around us. This, even if we throw out almost everything else would be enough reason to discipline a child and teach them self-discipline. And yes, they go hand in hand once the child becomes old enough to start to train.

But, especially being a Christian, I believe that I have an even more important function and role in the responsibility of disciplining a child, and that is, we need to train our children so that they know how to properly hear and respond to the voice of God speaking to them. This is our most important job. So how do we do that? And how does discipline come into play?

(By the way, this is the extremely SHORT version of this topic. So, let me say this. Assume that everything that is being done is done in LOVE and in balance. Thanks).

Discipline is tool that is used to teach our children to hear and respond to our voices first. And, again, that alone is critical. My goal is to train my child so that when they hear my voice they immediately stop and listen. Not me screaming or yelling. Just when they hear me say their name. And, as a parent I can only tell you how many times just that alone has been worth the effort. Say, for instance, when I call my child's name just before they're about to chase a ball, or step in the way of someone walking quickly with a shopping cart that might just plow them over. I can only feel that of my three older girls, at least one time serious injury has been avoided because they know they voice of their father (or mother as the case may be) and have learned to respond to it. Discipline is used to teach our children to listen to the voice of authority and respond.

As parents, we have been given the gift of our children. They are not ours. They are on loan from God. Created for his purpose. We are their caretakers, their stewards and they are given into our custody for the purpose of training them as eternal beings. And thus comes the longer term and more significant purpose of discipline that we aim for - training them to hear the voice of God and properly responding to him.

By training our children, in a LOVING environment, by using discipline we teach them that there is a voice of authority that loves them and cares for them. We teach them that the voice they are hearing can be trusted, that is for them and is looking out for their best interest. We let them know that there is someone "bigger" than them (in the physical, at least older and wiser) that they can learn to hear and trust to help them. And, in this way, we are modeling for our children how to listen and to trust the voice of God.

And, this then is how we see that what scripture tells us is true. As I mentioned at that top, scripture says that a parent that doesn't discipline his child doesn't love them. And if I didn't discipline my kids, and teach them how to listen to my voice and hopefully the voice of their REAL father in heaven, then I wouldn't really be loving them. Because in the end, whatever my kids choose to do, they aren't going to have to give an account before me, they have to stand before the Lord. And what kind of parent would I be that wouldn't prepare them for that day? Certainly not one that loves them.

And so, that's why loving parents must discipline their children. Because by discipline, then teaching them self-discipline and proper response to authority, we are teaching them how to respond to the Lord. How to help them listen and get into the best things that an almighty and loving creator and savior has for their lives. And, of course, at the end of it all, we're even teaching them the very thing that may save their life not just here on earth - but for all eternity.

Next time, maybe I'll talk about what discipline really "means" - or in other words - HOW do we discipline our children. And folks that is a topic that I'm big on!

Ciao!

The Best Part of Being "Dad"

You know, there are probably a lot of "best" parts that I haven't mentioned, but there is one part that can only happen late at night that leaves you with a feeling of love and of responsibility that makes being dad worth being dad.

Tonight, I had one of those moments with daughter number three: Chloe. Was it a big thing? Well, to a three year old it was. She woke up suddenly, scared and calling for me. Not mom, me. Yup, good old dad. So, there, on the stairway, in the dark with the wind whipping all around the house, Chloe found comfort in daddy's arms. With blankie by her side, twiddling her "pony hair" and cuddled up next to me - Chloe found a place of safety, a place of peace. And boys and girls, that's when you know as a parent you've done a good job. When the babies are ready to run to your arms and trust you. Sure, kids always WANT to do that with their parents. They hope for it and yearn for it. The thing that's great is when YOU know that you've really provided it for them.

Thanks Chloe. It's great being your dad.

The Burbank Chronicles - Conclusion

Hey all,

OK, it seems I've got a lot of rants off my chest lately, so how about a happy post. That is for the two other people that read this blog anyway ;-)

So, Disney. I made it back after the 4th of July. Finally. I can't recall if I had mentioned that I had subluxated my knee-cap or not, but I was dying out there. Yes, finally after having my knee-cap out for 5 days it finally got put back in (THANK YOU SHADI!), but my leg was still killing me!

Anyway, there's lots more to that story, but the end of it was that I got my leg worked on while I was out there, could walk much more like a normal person, did 5 presentations of the findings for Disney AND I got to go to Disneyland! Unfortunately, I didn't have all the pictures cleared out of my phone so I didn't get a lot of the pictures I should have! But, I have finally gotten the pictures off the phone (yea for AppleCamp - more on that another post or podcast) and YOU my friends finally get to see what I snapped! Enjoy the pics :-)

In Hollywood: Graumans Chinese



A view from the office that I stole for a couple of days.






Hollywood and Highland (around the corner from the Walk of Fame and Kodak Theater)



The WB Studios as I drove Past



What Jenna had for dinner at the OUTRAGEOUS Restaraunt at Disney Land



Not from LA LA Land - but this is what I was missing. No wonder I couldn't wait to get home! Chloe (3) and Sophie (3 1/2 months)

Right - the Founding Fathers Believed NOTHING Like the Liberals do now.

I know you can see the image below my notes already. I felt compelled to add this even though it's a bit past the 4th of July. This topic is one that totally frosts me. When you read below you will clearly see an example carried out by one of the sons of the founders (John Quincy Adams, son of John Adams) that the founding fathers considered Christianity (not just the tenants of Christianity mind you) not separate - but the foundation of our nation. Anyone who says that this was a secular nation and says that the founders were deists or that there should be a wall of separation (which is NEVER said ANYWHERE in the Constitution, Declaration or any of the Bills) is seriously in denial of what the founders of our country WROTE repeatedly!

OK, enough blathering - here you go - read for yourself!

Man Have I got a... well, OK, this is the last one!

So. I finally got home (without completely scratching every part of my body) late (very) Friday night (almost Saturday morning). Alas, my sister had shown up at my mom's house while I was gone for the week and had organized a little family get together (Italian family get together = at least 30 people and food for 60) for that Saturday. And, being that I'm the dutiful brother - or something like that - I was obligated to show up.

Unfortunatly, because I had to show up, I also didn't have time to get my hair cut, my lawn mowed or the damn RASH looked at.

Fast forward. Saturday night (early Sunday morning) and my hands are suddenly covered with bumps, and the rash is now on the inside of my thighs (oh, stop that!) and on my waist. I was freaking. I thought for sure the closest thing I could find to what I had was Scabies. I figured I had gotten it while on one of my recent trips. Really, I was freaking.

So, Sunday morning when I get up, sure enough everything is still really bad. So, off to the emergency room (but hey, this is my emergency room now - not some ER in Burbank!) to have my rash looked at. Do I feel like an idiot? SURE! But damn, I was really concerned.

So, after reading through a chapter or so of my UltraMetabolism book while I was in the waiting room (and listening to a few podcasts), I get called in. The doctor looks me over, thankfully nukes the thought of Scabies (if you don't know what Scabies is by the way, it's a nasty rash that's caused by little mites that infest you and burrow into your dead skin cells. It's a royal pain in the BUTT to get rid of and you can infest your whole family - something very scary to a man with a 4 month old baby that sleeps in the same bed with him) and tells me it's either a reaction to some plant, but more than likely he thinks fungus. Which gets me to thinking.

So, off I go to the pharmacy with my prescriptions for Prednizone and some other steroidal topical ointment. Get the stuff, read the indications (God! Am I sure I really want to take this stuff?) but then, like the good little boy, I pop the pills.

Then I start doing more research. First of all, steroids in this case will inhibit my immune system from responding properly to the allergens in my system. This is why the bumps all over my hands will go away. The bad part of that is that my system was doing what it was SUPPOSED to do. Damn, I'm in a DETOX. So, as a person with diary allergies (mild), wheat allergies (not so mild) and candadiasis (candida albicans) who's detoxed before - I should have realized that the rash was because I had all the yeast in my system that was no longer getting fed being flushed out! And, then I looked at the topical cream and sure enough - it specifically mentions candadiasis!

After this I tracked down the book that I used to detox about 12 years ago. Sure enough, one of the indications/symptoms is a rash. However the book cautions that you shouldn't take any medications to stop the rash because they'll cause the toxins to end up burried in your system. Great. So I'm not really dealing with the toxins, so where the hell are they going?

Well, again, I went back to the warning labels on the steriods and the cream. Based on what I read, it seems like my body will essentiallly funnel out the toxins through my, uhhh, excretions. It's one of the side effects. Still, I'm not completely jazzed about the whole thing. After all, I don't want to detox only to find myself more ill because I kept the toxins in. Sigh.

Finally, Monday morning comes and along with Monday morning do many of the bumps on my hands again. Well, I called the pharmacist, found out how fast I could taper down from the mega-dose I was on. Pretty fast as it turns out. But what to do with the rash. I don't have enough time to track down how to handle it with a more natural method, I don't have a doctor I can go to without a referral from my primary doctor, not to mention I'd have to make an appointment. So, I'd have a rash, not know what to do with it and I was going to an interview in the morning on top of it.

I did what any good pill popper would do. I took the drugs. Of course, even though I'm on steriods I still haven't started lifting weights to take advantage of it. Heck, the way my knee has been I haven't done much at all. Though, I will admit, the steriods have really helped my knee feel better too. Sigh.

So, I'm three days in. I'm taking the last of my large dose this morning. After that, I think I'm going to taper down. I'm hoping that the worst of the detox is over (though I'm in the 3rd week now) and that the rash won't come back with a vengence. At the same time, I'm concerned about the fact that I've prohibited my body from cleansing the way I'm suppposed to. Damn, it's complicated! I'll figure it out sooner or later - but I don't know which yet. I'll let you know on my final decision - but until then, it's great not being covered with a itchy, hivey rash!

Now to bed, then to Apple Camp with my oldest daughter Halle in the AM. I'll have pictures of that :-)

Man, Have I got a rash (continued)

So, having determined that I've got this lovely rash, now I have to see if I can get it dealt with. So far nothing topical is working, including hydrocortizine, triple-antibacterial and some other thing that was prescribed for a different rash.

What do I do? Check with my healthcare. Listen. My healthcare when I'm inside the state is great. However, when I'm not inside the state... not so much. What do they tell me to do? Go to an emergency room! Sure! No worries! I'll just pop down in the middle of the meeting schedule I'm maintaining while I'm out here. You know, into the emergency room then, WAIT. Are you kidding? I've got a rash! Do you know how low on the priority list I'm going to be? Anyone and everyone that comes into the place is going to end up in front of me. Kids with the croup, Susie with her sprained finger, Bobby with is sprained ankle, Betty Boop with her deflated silicon bustline (we're in LA after all). Everyone.

So, can I go to a doctor? No. Not covered. OK, how about if I go to a doctor and pay for it myself and get a prescription. Is the prescription covered? No. The only thing I can do is go to an emergency room. Period, paragraph.

I had only one thing to do. I put some more hydrocortizine cream on it, took some benedril and I'm making an appointment with my doctor when I get home.

Now. To a voicemail message I received on this.

Dear Caller,

You are far over reacting and jumping on the alternative medicine field in blaming them for this rash. The book and plan I'm currently following is written by Dr. Mark Hyman, formerly one of the co-directors of the Canyon Ranch in the Berkshires and a currently practicing medical doctor in the Boston, MA area.

Yes, as I mentioned in my previous post, I was taking something for inflamation support. And, as I mentioned, I stopped taking it. In fact, it's been 5 days since I stopped taking it. And, the rash just popped up in a new place. It's not the herbs for the inflamation at this point. No way I could still be reacting to it this far out.

Now, regarding herbs. Let me ask you, where do you think the find the basis for most pharmacuticals? Herbs. The big pharma companies just do more processing of them, combine them and create all kinds of health risks beyond what would have been a risk as part of the normal consequence of taking the herb itself. This, done by an industry (big pharma) that kills more people yearly (over 780,000) than either heart disease (699,000) or cancer (533,000).

Sorry, and why exactly should I run to that doctor?

Please. Don't misconstrue what I feel on this either. I believe that there is a place for modern western medicine. I believe that we need antibiotics for when we have infections. And I do believe that there are some people that actually have a need for some of the drugs that are created.

Having said that, I also believe that there are more people than not that are unhealthy because they've screwed up their systems with the poision that is sold every day in what we call grocery stores. Highly processed, chemically modified foods that bear no resemblence to the food that my parents ate in the early part of the 20th century. And those foods (and foods are DRUGS mind you, completely and TOTALLY) that people eat are toxic and screw up thier systems. These foods cause problems with our bodies because we don't eat REAL food.

I believe that if more people changed thier diet, we'd have more people that are less dependant on drugs. Say, just for example, someone in my family. My nephew. This darling little child eats CRAP and he acts like crap and they've thrown all kinds of tags on him like ADHD. So, what's the solution? Drug the little bugger till you don't even know it's him. And man, if the drugs wear off you're in trouble! Hey! I've got an idea! Why don't you take all the caffenee, red dye and sugar out of his diet, put him to bed at a normal hour so that he gets the sleep he needs and find out how that works! NAH.

In addition to that, I also believe that many people that deal with health issues, especially mental health issues, are also dealing with a spiritual battle. Yes, spiritual. I know this isn't necessarily a popular view, but then again, I'm not running for office I don't need to be popular.

However, because these spiritual issues require a spiritual solution, and because most people are not willing to go to a place emotionally or mentally where they are willing to take accountability before God to deal with these issues - then they have to deal with them another way. Hey, have another pill.

Further more, I also believe that some people are dealing with specific spiritual beings. These beings don't go anywhere or respond to anything other than the authority of Jesus Christ. So, when dealing with a spiritual being that is causing all kinds of bad behavior, what do we in the modern world do? WE DRUG PEOPLE. Because doctors are scientific and don't believe in spiritual beings, and anyone not a Christian that does believe in spiritual beings is probably inviting the ones that are causing the issues in the first place! Hey, have another PILL!

Lastly, there are some issues that come to even those who believe. These issues may be generational, or may be left over from their pre-Christian days. Some issues of these types may only be worked out by care and love and counseling that enable the believer to recognize the issues exist and take authority by the blood of the lamb. But, again, the medical community doesn't believe such things so they provide their solution. HEY, HAVE ANOTHER PILL!

Having said all that, I again state that I believe there is a place for modern western medicine. I do believe that there are even some cases where some type of medication is required for people (even believers) that have unequal mental and emotional equilibriums. I also believe that those cases are rare, and few and far between. I would even go so far as to say that someone I know that uses these medications (no, not you caller, not to the best of my knowledge) and doesn't NEED to, but really needs to deal with (a) diet, and (b) a spiritual issue. But I will say this caller, I'd love to see God heal and/or deliver you so that you didn't have a need for these things!

So, there you go. Maybe it wasn't the exact end I had planned for what was supposed to be a humorous post starting yesterday, but it's what we've got. Got an opinion? Let me know.

Man, Have I got a rash on the back of my a...

And a bizzare one at that. It started the other day on my butt. No, it ain't pretty.

Of course, my question was, how the heck did I get a rash on my butt? I've got to have one of the cleanest butts on the planet. Listen, one of my buddies calls me Mr. Hygene for a reason you know? I mean how many guys do you know that have stopped in an airport of a third world country and created a sterile zone? Right?

But, none the less, there it was. Now, I know I haven't been sitting in posion ivy, I know I don't have any STDs. So what the heck can this be?

I've been on a great detox as part of the first three weeks of the UltraMetabolism diet (check it out!), so I thought maybe it was something I'm eating. Well, considering that I cut out virtually everything that I was already alergic to, I don't think it's that! Maybe I'm having too much cashew-butter? Nah. I've been known to wipe out an entire can of cashews by myself.

I was taking something for inflamation because I had subluxated my knee-cap (that means that it hurt like all hell - just so you know and can send sympathy cards). It was the only major thing different. So, I stopped taking it.

Still had a rash.

Then, suddenly, for no discernable reason my rash jumps from the cozy warm confines of my little Italian tushie to my ankle. My ANKLE? What's with that?

But wait! Suddenly it's now on my right thumb! HUH? Yes, just my right thumb. Not my hand, not my wrist or anyplace else. My thumb. And then, just as inexplicably, it's on the inside of my left pinky. Two little spots. That's it. Just two.

But wait! Now it's on my right forearm!

What the hell is this thing?

No, it's not real itchy. It doesn't seem to be spreading in any discernable pattern. My ankle is no longer itchy and my forearm never really has been.

Hang on though folks... there's more! Next post you'll find out...

Real Beauty

I was just watching TV, one of the luxuries of being on the road. OK, I watch at home too, but watching on the road always gives me a different perspective.

In this particular case, I was watching a commercial that came on (nope, no Tivo out here!) and it was all about hair color. At the end of this hair color commercial the sponsor company puts up a web site address "campaignforrealbeauty.com"

Am I the only one that finds that wrong?

As with so much else I see around me, it seems like companies much like the people who make them up, miss the real point in things. In this case, they've missed real beauty. No, not just because they had a hair color commercial before the web site address, but because they're missing what real beauty is.

Being in LA for the week, and being out and about town a bit, I get to see all kinds of "beauty." Some natural, some not. And, as a disclaimer, no, I don't think there is anything wrong with being physically attractive. Good thing too, my wife is one hot number and if I thought that was wrong I'd be in real trouble!

But beauty isn't something that's external. Oddly enough I think Hollywood got it right finally (well, kind of) when they released shallow Hal. My favorite scene is when they show Hal going on a trip (I think it's with Gweneth Paltrow's character) and another couple. When they show the other couple in "normal view" the chick is supposed to be a real hottie, but when they show Hal's view they show a shriveled up old hag. And thus, in many cases, is the truth.

Real beauty is something that happens from the inside out. And, it's the reason why this week I've been pining away for my honey. I know I've mentioned my wife at different times, but I'll risk talking about her for a moment again. Besides being muy caliente physically, my wife is also very smart (delivered the speech to the National Honor Society when she was in high school - yah, smart), thrifty, industrious, virtuous, kind, considerate, caring, loving, charming, charismatic, a leader of women, a trust worthy confidant, compassionate and above all else, a woman with a heart after God. My wife has more character in her pinkie than most people hope to have in their life time. And that folks is real beauty.

Real beauty is the thing that makes your heart ache when you're 3000 miles away. Real beauty is what makes you miss someone even when you're 300 feet away. Real beauty is that thing that draws you to someone like a magnet long after the initial infatuation with physical beauty has worn off. Real beauty is what makes you confident you can share your most important dreams, greatest triumphs and worse disappointments - and know that you'll get the best resopnse. Real beauty is what motivates you even when you aren't motivated, it's what keeps you going when you can't even see where you're going, and it gives you strength when you've no strength left.

So. I'd like to start a campaign for real beauty too. I'll start with me. I know what I'm doing. I'm getting in front of the most powerful being in the universe and I'm asking him to give me real beauty. I'm asking him to change me so that I look so much like him - that people actually see him. Because, if I do that, then I'm going to have all those things I told you about my wife. How do I know that? LOL. Where do you think she gets all those great attributes from? Right. It's called Godly character, and it is real beauty.

Galations 5:22-23 says "But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faith, gentleness (also meekness which is defined as power with restraint), and self-control. Against such things there is no law." A lot of people talk a lot of smack about the Bible, but here's the crux. Can you find anything wrong with all of us exhibiting more of the above? Would this world be a better or worse place if we did? Exactly.

Here's the deal. Like I said, I'll start with me. You want to help beautify the world? Give it real beauty? Have a go at it too.

I just don't get it, do you?

I was just watching TLC's What Not to Wear. There's a surprise, eh? And, while I think I'm planning a mini-rant on this for the Metro Moment (http://metromoment.blogspot.com) I just thought I'd leave a note here too.

As usual, Stacy and Clinton show up to rescue a dowdy fire plug of a woman from her awful sense of fashion - or lack thereof. In this case, the woman even knows who Stacy and Clinton are because she watches the show.

So, now, here's what I don't get. This chick watches the show. Of course, she knows that everyone around her thinks she doesn't dress worth shite. She AGREES to go on the show. THEN she proceedes to fight everyone, Stacy, Clinton, Nick (the hair guy), and Carmindy (the makeup specialist) regarding her clothes, her hair length (she's determined it's not going to be short because she wants it long - HELLO) and her make up (well, she found how it was applied instructional - GAG).

Tell me. Why did this chick go on the show? She had a face on the entire time she was in hair and makeup. She was crying when Nick was going to show her what her hair looked like, and damn(!) he didn't even cut it that short (as were her wishes). I just don't get why she would go on this show, knowing full well that everyone around her wanted her to help herself, knowing that the fashion experts were there to help her look fabulous - and fight it! Honestly, she totally became completely unsympathetic for me. And I've got to tell you, that takes some work. So why did she go on?

This reminds me of the way so many people (including me, mind you) are with their lives. Everything can be going to puppy droppings around them and still, despite the best efforts of those that love them they still insist upon doing it their own way. In fact, it's often the way we are with God too, even as Christians - which makes the absolutel LEAST sense. But, it's true. And, like you too, I still see this all the time both in and out of the church.

I see it outside the body of Christ because people don't see the true nature of the Spirit of God living in us, so when we tell them that Jesus loves them and God has redeemed them and they can experience true liberty - all they here is "religion" and going to church. FOR SHAME! On all of us! We (those already redeemed by the blood, those of us already with our names written in the Lamb's Book of Life according to scripture) need to carry more of the Lord's presence with us! We (and I'm pointing at myself here too!) all need to spend more time with the Father so that we can become more like him! That's what people will respond to.

I see it inside the body because even though people claim they want to live as Christians (in a Christ like manner), so many of them still want to hold on to their old "stinkin thinkin", bad habits and everything else! You'd figure that these folks that were finally responsive enough to the Spirit of the Lord to get saved, these people that know the liberty of salvation - would want all the freedom and everything that Jesus can give them! And still, it isn't so. Sigh.

Well, at the end of the show, Mrs. Recalcitrant was crying during her reveal and telling Stacy and Clinton that "it" wasn't about the just about the looks, it was an internal thing as well. It was a change in her heart that the experience had made in her. Finally I think she got it. Hopefully, I pray that we all get it, don't you?

Hi, My Name is Phillip and I've got a Porn Issue

This post is born from an experience I had last Friday night. I was at a men's dinner at church where we had a guest speaker in, a guy who happens to be both an ordained minister AND a local sports talk show host. What was great about Larry was that right from the start he was from the hip and brutally honest. It was a great message that he gave.

Part of that message, and one that I talked about with other guys as well, was his story of how he called the cable company and had Cinimax turned off on his cable TV. Not because all Cinimax movies are bad, but because some of the programming contained pretty women in little or no clothing - and frankly it wasn't doing him any good.

Here, here.

That was a good biblical thing that Larry did. And, I've done it too. Scripture says that we should make a covenant with our eyes to put no unclean thing before them. And, it says that we should flee from evil. Good choice for Larry and me.

But I've got an issue.

23 years ago (almost 24) when I was saved I threw out all of my porn collection. I was actually stunned at the amount of magazines I had. That was 1982. I had no problems with porn until 1992 - the advent of the internet in my life. Still, it wasn't a big issue and it was pretty well laid to rest until 1995 when I finally had to have a computer in my house.

And there in lies the big rub. Unlike magazines, or even movie channels, I can't throw out my computer because the computer and the internet are where and how I make my money.

Yes. I've used proxies. Yes, I've set up firewalls. Here's what I've found. I get ticked off because I have them on - regardless of if I think of looking at someone's boobs or not. And, of course because I'm the resident geek in the house, there's nothing my wife can set up (if she was ever so inclined) that if I wanted to defeat it, I couldn't find a way around anyway. (and by the way, I do THAT just to see if it can be done - regardless of if I was tempted to look at something inappropriate).

My thoughts on the proxy by the way - it didn't ever really deal with the intention of the heart. And that ladies and gents is always the issue.

So what do I do then? Well, thankfully, I've never really gotten into porn. My idea of porn is still that of the 14 year old that looked at his dad's Playboy in the early 70's - boobs. I never got into any of the other stuff that resembled more of a OB-GYN monthly. Ewww. And honestly, that's been a HUGE benefit to me. Frankly, it's almost impossible to find something quite so boring or mundane as a woman without a shirt on without all the nastiest ads around it. And, I just don't go there - so it helps me resist the temptation even more.

But still, what do I do with this issue?

Well, to this date, I'm still not perfect - but I can tell you what God has done with me. Because, as I mentioned, this is a heart issue and it's God that wants my heart. And, if God more prevelantly dwells in my heart and my every thought is taken captive to him, and He in his holiness shines the spotlight on that thought - well, those thoughts don't last long.

And that's what I do. I have to say that this year has been probably the best year since I've required a connection to the net. I've gone long stretches without making a stupid decision - which I then regret almost immediately by the way. And, it's all to God's glory. Whatever the issues are in my heart, in me, about me - God is working those out. And, because of that I find that I'm a much free-er man.

Of course the fact that I have 4 daughters makes it even more necessary that I deal with this. The fact that any picture that I've looked at is of someone elses daughter greives my heart terribly. I hate to even THINK I could be that horrible. And that helps too.

So, am I there yet? Not quite, but I'm getting SOOOOO close. And in the process God is doing some wonderful things in me. One of the biggest things I've learned in the years of dealing with this issue is GRACE. You see, 10 years ago I didn't have much grace. Today, I abound in it. Why? Well silly, because I have an understanding of the NEED for grace so much more. I understand the grace that God extends to me. I understand the love he pours out each time I turn and ask his forgiveness. And in that I've become a better man, a better husband (ironically) and a better dad. I have lots of grace for my family now!

So, there it is, my name it Phillip and I've got a porn issue. No, I'm not an addict. Porn isn't something I'm addicted to. It's not something that causes cravings in my system. It's not a crutch. BUT, it is an issue. It's a distraction. It's sin that I know that God doesn't want in my life, and by his grace - as he promises - he is working to perfect me until I reach the day of completion (when I see him face to face).

And now you know. So, does this make me a hypocrite? Thankfully, no. A hypocrite is someone that sees issues in others but doesn't (or refuses to) recognize his own issues. No, this makes me a sinner saved by grace. In fact, it is almost the perfect example! Made clear mind you by a sin that most everyone understands is sin. Most people don't understand when sins like pride, or over eating or other sins that can really only be known by a loved one or God are discussed. But this? Everyone can understand this. And so, God has redeemed me, and he's working out his process of redemption in my all to human flesh. Thank you Jesus! I truly do appreciate it.

And, if you're someone that has a sin in your life, even if it isn't so easily identifiable as this one, the good news is that God can do the same thing for you. He can save you from your sin. He can expose the sin that is burried or hidden (like porn was with me before the internet), reveal it and then deal with the issues of the heart that cause it. At the end of the process you to can be a free-er man or woman too. Isn't that cool?

Thank you again Jesus - and to God be all the glory. Amen.

What's that show's name?

Can anyone tell me, since Ken Ray and Laura Burstein left, ummmmm you know that other Mac show - geesh I've got to look it up, hang on - oh, Inside Mac (which, by the way I was on at one point and I'm eternally grateful to Scott Shepard for) that's the one. Does anyone still listen to them? Not that Scott isn't good, but without Laura and Ken, it really becomes one note repeating to me - so over time I stopped listening and iTunes doesn't update it anymore. That happen to anyone else?

"Tolerant" Governor - not so much.

O-tay. Before you read any of my rant, read this. When you're done come on back.

http://www.baltimoresun.com/news/local/politics/bal-md.metro16jun16,0,5412195.story?coll=bal-home-headlines

This is the perfect example of "tolerance" double speak. This governor is tolerant of anyone that doesn't have an opinion, or more importantly a belief. Here's the deal, I'm sure that "Mr. I'm Gay and Just Got a Guy Fired" has made plenty of intolerant statements. In fact, homosexuals in general are famous for casting aspersions.

And what did the guy who got fired do? He simply made a statement. He specifically shared his opinion based on his convictions and beliefs. BOOM. GAME OVER. Dude, that's not tolerant!

But you know what? I'm not tolerant either. I'm really sick of people doing stuff like this. I am not tolerant of two faced irresponsible "politically correct" sycophants that are happy to quickly point their finger at someone and that won't be responsible themselves. Here's my word to them - buy a clue!

I'm going to go on record with the guy that got fired. I don't think that homosexuality is a normal life style either. And, just so you know exactly how consistent I am in sharing that I believe it's deviant - it's the same thing I told my SISTER. Yes, my sister is currently claiming that she's homosexual. Correct. But to show you even more how consistant I am, let me share this. While my sister was still sleeping with guys - I told her that I thought her practice of sleeping with MANY guys was just as damaging and destructive to her and her family as her current poor behavior is.

Let me ask you a question. Because I said this to my sister, does that mean that I don't love her? Don't be an idiot. Of course I do. And, it breaks my heart that she continues to make these decisions that impact her life and the life of her family so dramatically.

In the same way, just because I'm willing to say to any homosexual that according to scripture their life style is not right, it doesn't mean that I don't love or care for them. Au contraire. It's because I want the best for them spiritually AND physically that I want them to know that the God of all creation loves them, died for their sin and wants to set them free to live in the liberty of Jesus rather than the bondage of the life style of sin. And yes, I do believe that homosexuality is sin. It doesn't mean that I hate anyone - except the enemy of our souls! Do I always like how homosexual activists get in our face? No. Do I find the public displays of lewdness associated with "gay" pride parades disgusting? YES!. I would also find that kind of public display of lewdness of heterosexual behavior offensive too. Know why? Because either way, it's still sin. Capice?

And still, through it all, I'm not any less tolerant of these people. Is my life different that theirs? Yes. Do I believe they need a personal relationship with Jesus in order to be saved? Yes. And I belive that for ALL people. And for all people I will unashamedly state, I believe that Jesus is the salvation of the world. So, no matter who you are, no matter what your behavior - sexually (hetero or homosexual promiscuity or sex outside of marriage), socially (hate crimes, anger, public drunkeness, drugs, gang wars, murder, spousal abuse, child abuse and murder) or whatever - Jesus can and has forgiven it all. He can forgive your sin and give you a brilliant life of freedom and joy. All you need to do is ask him.

So, right now, let me ask you, pray with me! Don't worry that you're "not good enough" neither was I, or King David who committed murder and adultery or the Apostle Paul who sought out early Christians and stoned them to death before Jesus appeard to them! Right now ask the Lord to save you and give you new life. Say Lord, I know I haven't done right, I know that I've sinned. But Lord, you said you loved the world so much - including ME - that you died on the cross to cover my sins. Jesus, I accept your sacrifice for my sins. And now, according to your very words Lord, I am a NEW creation. My sin is washed away! I have a NEW start!

And how cool is that! Before you go, let me encourage you to let someone know what you've just done. Send me an email. If you need help finding a church that teaches the whole Bible of Gods truth, justice and love, let me know. And remember, this is the first day of the rest of your life. Jesus has set you free! With that you have new opportunities. Sure, you may have bad days. Hey, you've got a whole life time of habits that the Holy Spirit is working on, if you slip, don't worry. Jesus isn't surprised and he's still there ready to hold your hand and help you into the incredible life he has created for you. Read your Bible and PRAY! Every day talk with God (that means pray, that's what prayer is!) and remember to be still sometimes so that he can talk to you, tell you how much he loves you and direct you on the path to his promises!

Peace!

AirTran SUCKS (well, not completely it seems)

I received a phone call from AirTran. They will be refunding the full purchase price - not allegedly do to my rant - but because I hadn't spoken to customer service. Right. Actually, I did speak to customer service and I asked to speak to a supervisor and I got voicemail and no call back. Then I did the post and sent the rant. At any rate, AirTran actually stopped acting like heartless automatons with the sensitivity of toilet seats and provided a full refund due to the "extenuating circumstances." OK. I'm not going to argue. They still claim that nothing was their fault - which still irks me - but I don't think it will do any good or change their policy any futher. And I'll give the props for calling me back. Now, will I willinging choose AirTran againin the future? That remains to be seen.

Ciao.



It's not often that I spend time railing against the machine, but this time I'm going
to. I'm also going to make sure I say this as many times in as many places (like podcasts, blogs, local consumer news teams and the like) that I can.



Who knows, maybe that will get AirTran's attention. And, while I may not get my ticket refunded, I'm betting that it's going to cost AirTran a LOT more than the price of my ticket in the end. And, hopefully, the next time someone calls them that has lost a loved one and wants a refund because the AirTran plane was late - they won't act like TOTAL FRACKING IDIOTS and they'll show some compassion to the person on the other end of the phone.

We Interrupt our Regularly Scheduled Programming...

At 10:21 life was very normal. At 10:22, life - and death - took on a new meaning.

In that minute, my phone rang and I was told that my nephew was dead. Killed in a car crash. As I was to find out later, he was killed because he had been in an argument and left in anger. And then, I can only hope, was just driving in anger and lost control of his car, hit an abutment head on and had his car burst into flames.

At 10:21 I was making some dessert for my wife and I. At 10:23 that dessert was looked at in a totally different light.

Unfortunately, I can't say that this ending to my nephew's life was wholy unexpected. It was part of the sad story that made up his life, including his stormy relationship with my sybling, and the story of my sybling itself which is so unreal that it couldn't be sold as fiction. No one would believe it. Heck, Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy is more believable as fiction or real life.

It's not to say that my nephew won't be missed. He will be. Honestly, my wife and I were dazed. He was our favorite nephew. He was the one we all thought was the sweetest, had the most natural charm. He had a great sense of humor and was gentle. But, alas, with everything that happened around him, most people didn't know that about him. Unfortunately including my sybling - his parent.

My nephew's life had become a roller coaster. In therapy, stealing, lighting things on fire. Off to a special school for 6-9 months, back again, admitted to a pysch hospital, then, drugged so that I almost didn't recognize the bright mind with the sharp wit that I had come to know. A couple of years of that, moved to a state and back again in a week with his parent, then sent to a school that you wouldn't wish upon your worst enemy. Let's just say it is safe to assume he had no role models there.

Finally, it all cumulated in a tragic argument and reaction that ended his life. All that flashed through my mind in a minute. Hello 10:23.

Of course, there's still my sybling. This was not their sole responsibility. Did they play a part? Sure, just as parents we all play a part. No, this decision was that of my nephew. His alone. As for my sybling, now they have to deal with the guilt of loosing a child with which they never knew peace. It's not that they didn't try, but alas, their vision to deal with the issues, their capcity to even recognize them was always compromised in some way or another. It wasn't a lack of love, but it was love that, for whatever reason, just never made it through. And now, they will never have the chance again to try and fix it. I hope for my sybling, they will find peace. I know that God waits for them and promises to give them that peace if they only ask. I hope my sybling can get past any and all of the issues they are dealing with and see they can ask. It's never too late. God's arm is never to short. He is there ready and willing to enfold them in his love.

Ah, it's 11:00 now. For me, what remains is sadness. I'm sad that my nephew never got to be what he could have been. He would have been brilliant. I'm sad that my sybling is dealing with what they have to deal with, in regards to my nephew and just their life in general. It's sad because they do have so much to offer as well.

But for now, weeping is for the evening, but joy comes in the morning. No, I don't think my sybling will be filled with joy in the morning. They have to much to do this week to deal with this tragedy. But joy can come. Assuredly, it can. Grace and mercy are there to meet them and help them on the road.

And so, for me, it's off to sleep. Good night nephew. A last good night. I hope that in the moments before you crashed, I pray, that you called out to the God that loved you, the one you knew in your youth, and now you rest in his arms - away from this turmoil, in perfect love and perfect peace, at rest finally in his presence. If that is so, then I know that someday when I at last say my last good night to this present world that you will be there, with the Lord, to greet me. I know that would bring a smile to my face and joy to my heart (yes, I think it would be the frosting on the cake I guess - as if being in the presence of the Lord won't be enough!) You are special, and you will always be in my heart. Good night.

The Burbank Chronicles - Part Tres

Hola! Como esta usted? Yo? Muy bien, gracis. :-) No, I'm not trying to scare you with my fish head mug shot done with my Sanyo 8300 mobile phone - but this is a picture of me in the office I was squatting at while at Disney. :-D Hi!

The third day in LA metro brought more of the same weather (you'll see in the pics, hang on) and more of the same meetings. The fun part was that I got to visit Hollywood! Not that Hollywood is any great shakes mind you.

Oh, here's the office with the trusty PowerBook.


It seems like it is about 200 yards of the Walk of Fame starting at Hollywood and Highland, then the Kodak Theater (which has frontage of about, oh maybe 40 feet?) then Grauman's Chinese theater (Gosh is it small!) I saw all the hand prints and foot prints, read the names. Then we went over to the Roosevelt Hotel. Lunch was nice (thank you Mickey!), I got to see the Hollywood sign and all. The company on the lunch was the most fun - Krista and Paul, you both Rock!

My view from the afore mentioned office.

So, again, I ended up at the office late - like 7:00pm. Though not as late as my host who ended up there until 10:30 and then had to be in at E3 at 6:30 the next morning! Owww! The bummer part about this was that I had set up to meet with Ed Melendez of Five Shock design (http://www.fiveshock.com) and hopefully do a bit of podcasting with him. He's getting ready to release his own podcast - and let me tell you - it's going to rock! Alas, I was too beat to think about getting back to the hotel, getting changed, getting food then driving out to his place which was about an hour away.

The valley in Burbank. You can't even see the hills...

So, instead I went back to the hotel, had the WORST cajun shrimp (the shrimp was waaaaay to fishey!) and watched the results show of Idol. OMG Chris! I was stunned. I would have thought Cathrine (though she is my favorite - and I will learn to spell her name!) because she had a tough night. Still, I thought Chris would be in the final. Yet, as I mentioned before, these guys are all getting albums. Count on it.

OK. That's it for the day. Soon to come, day four of the Burbank Chronicles. See you then!

The Burbank Chronicles - Part Deux

Hmmm. Being that I'm out here on the southern part of the left coast, I guess I should probably be using Spanish not French in the title, but... oh well for now.

So, day two dawns slightly brighter than day one. Yippie! Thankfully, I've got some sleep now and I'm almost fully functional, which is good because I've got a bunch of meetings set for today. This phase of the trip is all about meetings. Doing interviews and the like. It can be fun in some ways, and in other ways PAINFULLY boring. Thankfully, I've got so much information that I need to get it will be more engaging than not. I just have to make sure I don't totally crash around 3:00 or so when my body still thinks it's 6:00 or so.

I've found this incredible breakfast on the Hilton menu. Bircher Museli. Whole oats soaked in milk with raisins and nuts built in, then the fresh fruit of the day. Today was strawberries and banana's. It varied over the week, blueberries, granny smith apples, raspberries. Marvelously wonderful. And chock full of fiber! Important to the diet after all!

Lunch yesterday was good, we hit a local Mexican place. Lunch today was a Chinese Chicken salad from the heath food place around the corner. The chicken was good, the lettuce (the kind for Cesar salads) was fresh and crisp and the dressing was OUT of this WORLD! Yummy. Really it was a oil based with some great seasonings - but that is perfect on this essentially South Beach diet I'm working.

So, I was supposed to be heading out to my friend Seth's house, but I was in the office till 6:30, so no-go. It would have taken me at least an hour, probably 1 1/2 hours to get to Ventura where he is. So, I missed catching up with him and getting to go to the Bible study at his house. The good news is that I got to watch American Idol without having to wait till I got home and watch it on Tivo. Elvis night, very tough for Katherine, but I've got the MacFever and I'm a MacFan. You go girl! At the same time, Taylor was absolutely perfect. These tunes were right in his wheelhouse - including and wonderfully - In the Ghetto. For those who say Taylor is only about the SHOW, you need to hear his voice and his passion on a song like that. Brilliant. Chris - eh, 50/50. The second song didn't work for me at all. The first song was good except for the glasses. Elliot? Dude. What a voice. Absolutely 2 for 2. Really, I want all 4 of them to win this competition and as long as they don't put out absolute crap, I'll probably buy all of their albums - because they all will get record deals.

Anyway, then I watch some odd shows. Veronica Mars (because I skipped House - couldn't deal with the whole infant baby theme!) - which I caught about 1/2 way in. Believe it or not, I couldn't find much else to watch. And her dad is the guy that played Elliot from Just Shoot Me! How funny is that? After that, the Dead Zone with the kid (well, guy now) from 16 Candles and The Breakfast Club - Jon Michael Hall I think? Interesting concept, good mystery. I like how they let him be "psychic" without all the goofy hocus pocus. He touches stuff, BOOM, vision. It's more like he has this great device he can just turn on. Anyway, it was interesting enough for sure - especially considering the topic (illegal immigration) and my location!

That's it for now, time to pass out!

My First Full Day In LA (actually Burbank)

So, I wake up in the land of granola for the first time. Nice hotel, but no internet in the room. If you're booked into the Universal Hilton in Universal City, CA - make sure you're not in 1771!

Anyway. I'm expecting sun and palm trees. What do I get? here's a hint. I thought I was in Britan. FOG. Where the heck is the fabled Cali sun? As it turns out, it's been put away until at least 4:00 or so in the afternoon. It's lovely spring weather in SoCal. Yuck. Of course, back home it's raining (and it will all week to), but as of that moment, I just know that it was nicer for the past week in Boston than it was in the fabled land of Hollywood.

End of the day? Niiiccce. Sunny, not quite 70. And, I stopped at a handy Trader Joe's (yes they have them in MA - 2 I think - I drove past more than that in a 15 minute radius from the hotel) and picked up some great healthy stuff for dinner and snacks at work for the next few days.

After that, crash and burn. Jet lag caught up for sure. And now, off to bed as I try to adjust from jet lag again. More on the Burbank Chronicles soon!

Hello LA

So, I land at LAX after 6 1/2 hours in a center seat. This is it, I'm finally in LA. Finally after YEARS of wanting to get out here, I'm on the sacred soil of the City of Angels. What's my first impression?

Great, it's warm, people are in bad short sleeve shirts, over weight AND in the alleged capital of narcissism - I've got more second hand smoke coming in from outside the airport doors than you get outside an AA meeting.

Beautiful.

Home Schooling Life

So, this is home schooling life. Once a year, along with my lovely bride, I'm off to the New England Home Schooling Convention held in Worcester, MA. Worcester is one of those cities that is now greatly maligned, but at one point, especially around the turn of the 20th century, it was a hub of industry and finance for central MA. It's also the home town of the father of American Rocketry - Robert Goddard, and has a couple of the country's best schools (Holy Cross and WPI). There's ton's of great old architecture and happily, has a couple of nice places to eat.



We stay at the Crowne Plaza which (with the exception of this year) has been one of my favorite places to stay. Oh, sure, I've stayed at some really nice hotels over the years as I travel. Some $650 a night joints in NYC, some beautiful suites on the ocean in Florida. But, with the exception of those just for sheer luxury, I always enjoy the Crowne because the bed is great, there is free wi-fi in the rooms and in the lobby and I like their bathroom amenties. Of course, the best part about it is that my lovely wife is always with me. :-)



This year was interesting once again because we had a baby with us - Sophie's first convention. It always makes the convention more interesting trying to juggle the schedule of a nursing infant with seminar sessions and the need to hit the convention floor to find the latest in cutting edge learning systems. Hey, we really do put in some time trying to find the best curriculum for the learning style and interests of the kids! And yes, I'm a BIG believer in home schooling and the longer we do it the more benefits I find in doing it. Maybe that will be another post!



Anyway, it was a great convention this year, cooler because someone that I became friends with last convention - Senior Gamache of La Clase Divertida (the fun class) - got to host a session. We're using his stuff to teach the girls Spanish and they're loving it.



If you've got kids (primarily pre-teen) and you want a great curriculum then you should check his stuff out. Worth EVERY cent!

Of course, now I'm home (no time last night to do this! we were too busy finding a place to eat, which we did, Moe's Southwestern Grill - www.moes.com) and then I had to crash because we needed to get up and out to sessions in the morning. Ummm, but we really didn't get that done either! Sigh. Still, it was a great day. Lots of time to walk around in the center, lots of time to spend with my wifey. And, it was a day I didn't have to listen to my 3 year old (Chole) try to order the rest of us around. Yikes. She has a lot of great stuff inside her. A serious annointing. The tough part is getting through these years and raising her correctly so that she can be all the blessing she's supposed to be!

OK. Time for me to crash, church in the AM!

The Gift

I just got done watching Biography's show on Andre the Giant. Very cool. As a kid in the 60's and 70's watching Andre was amazing. And, of course like everyone, I loved him as the gentle giant in The Princess Bride. Andre was an effusive individual with a great talent to share, a big gift to make people smile. And, his opportunity ended at age 46 due to the condition that actually made him a giant.

Likewise, though at the same time totally unlike Andre, I've been told that I have a gift - and a big one - to share with the world. No, I'm not bragging, nor am I going to be immodest. It's something that's been said to me since I was young, not something that I just decided. No worries, I'm not the next psycho that has some group thinking they're catching space ships out of town. OK? But, I did want to mention it here.

A big difference between Andre and me is that Andre found out young what his gift was, and was able to pursue it. In me, I think I've always had an inkling, however I've been working on making me a better vessel to share the gift. It seems that until I'm ready mentally, emotionally and spiritually, I'll never see the full expression of my gifting. Oh, have I seen glimpses from time to time? Sure. But it's more like a baseball player that suddenly hits a towering 500 ft home run, then somehow returns to being a punch and judy doubles hitter. Or a basketball player (sorry for the sports analogies) that scores 50 points in a game, then suddenly drops back to scoring 18 pts on average.

But, still, the gift is there. And, I'm here still working it out. I'm excited that I'm getting closer to the day that the big breakthrough will happen, but of course thinking that hey! I'm not getting any younger here!

Having said that, here's my encouragement to you. I and I take solice in this as well. Zig Ziglar hit the big time when he was around 46 years old, about a year older than me. And he's not the only person to gain noteriety in a field, or "instant" success a bit later in life than these folks that hit the big time at 22 or something by founding an internet company. So, hang in there. Don't get discouraged. In fact, God even has his say in the book of Habbakuk where he says to wait on the vision because it will happen in due time.

Keep at it. Keep pushing. Keep growing. Don't stop. You NEVER know what's around the next corner. Don't let set backs keep you back. There is no one that hasn't hit obstacles in life. Push through them. Draw strength from those you love around you. Continue to pour out love. Stay single minded and rejoyce. It will happen. It will come to pass. Believe it to be true, not because I've said so, but because God has said it of you. Then let me know how it comes out, OK?

Peace!